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Post by aden on Nov 18, 2008 10:29:22 GMT -5
Hotaru started to cry and immediately Aden stood up from the edge of the pool. "Easy now," he said, patting the air at her to try and calm her down, but within seconds the waterworks had begun. He managed to retrain himself from grimmacing as the girl started sobbing. Aden hated such shows of emotion, but he couldn't quite bring himself to yell at Hotaru to stop.
"Easy," he repeated again, taking a few steps closer before going down on one knee to put him closer to her eye level. Truth be told, part of him wanted to agree with her and say that, yes, Firebending is dangerous and she should never ever use it. As far as Aden had ever seen, firebending was nothing but an instrument of destruction and war. A girl with this ability was like a priest with a battle axe... there was no reason she should ever hve to use it.
But he did promise Hissun... And as he continued to think on it, his own bending was a major part of who he was. If Hotaru were to deny that entire part of her identity, would she ever truly be whole? For years his instructors had always stressed balance, in training and in life. She may not be bending water, but Hotaru likely needed the same measure of understanding for her own abilities as he had.
"It's okay," he said at length, eventually daring to pat the girl on the arm gently. "Please, no more crying..." Aden really wasn't very experienced at dealing with children, and the closest thing he could think of was speaking to a dog or pet. "You don't have to bend right here," he went on, his voice as comforting as he could make it, "If you'd like, we can find some place else, or maybe I can put up some walls... Or maybe I could just show you some bending movements to try next time you feel like it?"
Aden spread his palms as he made his suggestions, hoping that somewhere among them was something that sounded good to Hotaru.
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Post by hotaru on Nov 18, 2008 10:44:08 GMT -5
Hotaru continued to sob but they became quieter and eventually tapered off to nothing, her eyes were now bleary but no sorer than before, after all she'd done nothing but cry for a while. It seemed to make it so that the pink puffiness around her eyes was permanent at least from her perspective.
Hopelessly she stared at Aden, he seemed to be trying hard and she felt a pang of guilt at holding him up like this. She just didn't want people to see her. Fire bending was wrong and even though every time she did it there was a small part of her that curled with enjoyment the rest of her mind told her it was something horrid she was doing. No one would be able to make it all go away much to her displeasure, she couldn't be normal or swap it out for water bending like she wanted to. She'd have to grow up eventually wouldn't she?
With a small glance over her shoulder she assessed how many people were looking their way, even if it was just one person it bothered her. It felt like they were judging her, dehumanizing her for being something different, even if that was the farthest thing from their minds her fast developing paranoia made her believe they thought the worst of her. Even Aden most likely thought she was a demon, even if he'd only known her for a couple minutes.
The tears stopped, only a sniffle came forth now and then but she took a couple deep breaths and looked back down at the ground, once she started to actually make fire people looked at her differently, seeing and being told had to be two different things.
" Maybe.. the walls...." She offered trying to make amends, she'd seen benders construct such things before, it shouldn't be too hard and it'd get peoples eyes off of her at least as far as she wanted to know. Her lips pursed together, she didn't want to give him extra work though. " I just don't like being watched...."
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Post by aden on Nov 19, 2008 0:10:24 GMT -5
Aden nodded a little bit when Hotaru offered to see how some privacy would help her to try bending. "Okay, we'll try that," he said, still keeping his voice as gentle as possible. Last thing he wanted was this girl geeting spooked and setting his hair on fire...
The fledgling teacher took a few steps back from Hotaru and then took a measure of their surroundings. After a moment of surveying how much room they'd need, he reached back towards the pool of water behind him and swung both hands around in a fluid pulling gesture. Water lifted and streamed out of the pool at his command, partially encircling the two of them with a decent amount of room to move around. Aden glanced around and made sure that the other students on the training ground couldn't eavesdrop, and then stretched out the arc of water until it was a six foot high wall of opaque ice.
Aden solidified the wall in place and then stood up straight, exhaling lightly. "There we are," Aden said, folding his hands behind his back, "No prying eyes to see your bending." He then gestured one hand around the open area and added, "Whenever you feel ready..."
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Post by hotaru on Nov 19, 2008 0:50:29 GMT -5
Her eyes followed Aden's movements as he bent the water from the pool, she loved the way water bending looked and wished that she could do that instead of the firebending she had. She turned to look about her as the water spread and solidified, to her it was simple amazing. Hotaru's eyes were open wide and her mouth was a small 'o'.
She twirled around back to Aden with a bit of her attention seemingly gone, she loved to watch strong water benders bend but it seemed it was her turn now. Cautiously she looked about herself to make sure the wall was large enough to block anyone from seeing her. She kept attempting to find some flaw in it but there wasn't anything she could find, it seemed she couldn't stall any longer. She'd have to show Aden what she could do.
Hotaru straightened himself up and took a deep breath, it'd been a while since she was training herself out on the tundra in the dead of night when she was the weakest. Her eye opened timidly and she felt the fire surge into her chest, it was comforting and frightening all at the same time and with a swift motion she moves her arms in a rough attempt at a water whip. Her hands were open like a waterbenders only her movements were choppier and unpolished, the way she moves was slightly off but there was a rush of right red and yellow flames surging out from her and hitting the ice wall melting some of it then fizzling away like nothing. Her arms tingled with the remains of the movement, warmth flowing through her and her blue eyes were a little wide. To some extent she loved firebending though every part of her mentality said it was wrong.
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Post by aden on Nov 20, 2008 0:01:05 GMT -5
Aden watched very closely as Hotaru steadied herself and attempted to create a 'fire whip'. It was certainly a far cry from what Aden had seen in battle. The flames practically sputtered from her hands as opposed to the roaring blasts of searing fire that came from the fists of experienced benders. Her motions also seemed very awkward. They were obviously attempting to emulate a waterbending maneuver, but they did not seem fitting with fire as the element.
"Okay," Aden started to say, pausing for a moment as he tried to think of a way to broach the subject delicately. This girl seemed like she had no previous training (as tradition would dictate), so she had much to improve upon.
"Well, that wasn't bad... But just out of curiosity, I'd like to see you try to bend like this." Aden held up one finger to signal her to wait, and he then bent a small handful of water out of the nearby pool. The young warrior strode over to stand beside Hotaru with the water floating in a sphere over his palm.
"Instead of something as complex as the water whip, try something as simple as a punch," he said, standing up straight beside her. "One my count, I want you to take a deep breath and then..." he took a step to his side and dropped his stance. He punched out his right hand in a fist, and the water under his control shot forward like a bolt and struck the ground a fair distance away.
He turned toward Hotaru and nodded with a small smile in an attempt to encourage her. It crossed his mind once more, just how strange it was for him to be teaching such an unusual student.... But Hissun had asked him personally for this favor, and he was not teaching her waterbending. Technically there was no violation of tradition.
"Shall we try this together?" he asked, and he pulled another handful of water from the ground. "On my word... Just breathe aaaaand, Strike!"
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Post by hotaru on Nov 20, 2008 10:21:31 GMT -5
Hotaru was skeptical, she watched Aden preform the maneuver he was trying to get her to learn, it didn't seem very much like water bending, it seemed more aggressive and less fluid but she wasn't bending water now was she. It was hard to wrap her mind around the idea of a new style but she'd listen to Aden and be a good student, the worst thing that could happen already happened, what more was there? It wasn't like her parents could die again or her family could abandon her again.
"Okay..." She moved herself in a position like Aden, trying to mimic him though she was a little off kilter, being a young girl her center of gravity was different from Aden's so she had to shift a little bit in order to be comfortable. Her hand moved into a fist and she felt an odd blockage in her hand, like something was building there, it was odd but she figured even if this was a lark then it would prove it this worked or not. She took a breath in on his command and punched the air.
This time flames sputtered from her hand, they were hotter than before, it went further but it was still at the ammature level, but for someone so untrained what else could be expected. Her eyes opened and she watched the flamed for a second or two until they were gone. She was surprised and found herself stuck in place. Maybe Aden knew something after all, it was some sort of result of training, no one else really got anything like that,.
It now seemed like the teen commanded all of the girls attention, it was so odd for her to have any progress other than flames in forced waterbending patterns. It felt like swimming up stream when she would have been more suited to floating with the current.
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Post by aden on Nov 20, 2008 22:49:50 GMT -5
Aden punched out his handful of water, providing a model for Hotaru to follow. He turned his head halfway through the maneuver to see how the girl handled this sort of technique. To his surprise, she actually seemed to produce a larger flame this time. Aden turned around, feeling somewhat proud of his ability to deduce what was missing from Hotaru's training. And yet, there was also something else he felt... something he couldn't quite describe.
"Good," Aden said after his moment of reflection. "Let's stick with this move for a little bit," he went on, walking around closer to Hotaru. "Stay in that punching stance and alternate with each hand." The young warrior dropped down into a fighting stance next to her and lifted one fist up in front of him.
"Try to breathe, and then punch." He took a breath and then thrust out his fist. "Breathe, and then punch." He punched out the other with a sharp exhale to help illustrate his airflow. "Back and forth, giving a quick breath out with each punch."
Aden straightened up a little bit and took a few steps back to give Hotaru some room. "Try that five times each side, and try to keep your breathing nice and rythmic."
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Post by hotaru on Nov 21, 2008 0:28:03 GMT -5
Hotaru nodded to Aden with a shy smile coming forward. He was somewhat encouraging and she felt a little better about doing this. She fixed up her stance and practiced breathing and did a punch without fire before starting onto the reps he suggested she try. There was still a bt of a nervous edge to her movements but it wasn't yelling or freaking out from the fire so what was the worst that could happen. She rolled her shoulders back lightly ready to begin.
Her body moved rigidly into the punch the first time, the fire burst forth and hit the ice wall. With each punch she found herself getting more accustomed to the movement, her fire a little stronger, the flames more compact and precise. She moved to the other arm and continued the flaming punches, she liked the applied water bending moves better, she felt more graceful with them but these provided results.
Was it horrible that she liked firebending in a twisted way? Honestly she felt good about creating flames, it felt satisfying, but that turned to thinking about the things that had ruined her life in her first place. Her smile dropped and her extended arm fell to her side.
If she mastered firebending, what good would it do?
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Post by aden on Nov 21, 2008 21:03:46 GMT -5
The little girl took her time getting set, but soon enough she was creating bursts of flame with her punches. Each strike produced a larger flame than the last and it seemed like somehow she was beginning to really get in touch with her bending. It was a sign of success for Aden as a teacher, but for some reason he felt as though there was a damper on how much joy he could feel for Hotaru.
With each punch and each burst of fire, there was a part of him that couldn't help but recoil in disgust. Despite all the progress he'd made in recent weeks in getting over his self-inflicted guilt, there still resided a lingering hatred for all things related to the Fire Nation. As illogical as it was, and as much as Aden knew on the surface that Hotaru was not the enemy, those deep-rooted prejudices manifested themself in an uneasiness that was beginning to creep into his mind.
"Very good," he told Hotaru after she had finished the exercise. Aden was resolute to uphold his agreement to Hissun, even if he was beginning to have second thoughts about what he was doing. But rather than stop teaching her entirely, he figured that he would just take the lesson in a new direction... One that didn't involve actual fire, which he felt was the source of his anxiety.
"Let's take a break from that for a moment..." Aden said as he took a few steps closer to the girl and lifted up a section of ice from the ground for himself to sit on. With a second gesture he raised up another block of ice for Hotaru to sit on and he motioned for her to have a seat as well.
For a moment he simply waited in silence as he considered exactly where to take this lesson, but after some recollection about his own teachings in the past he decided on something he felt was applicable to all the bending disciplines.
"You're making progress, but when you bend there's more to it than just technique. Technique is there to help maximize the effectiveness of your bending, and to provide structure and direction for when you use it. But what really makes a bender powerful, more so than the practice and the skill, is their spirit."
Aden shifted his gaze back and forth between Hotaru, his gloves, and the ground as he spoke. He felt a little awkward trying to sound sagely and wise to this little girl who might just as likely believe him if he said the key to bending was to wear purple undershorts... Regardless, though, this as as close as it came for him to speaking from the heart.
"You have to really feel the connection between you and your element. It is not the strength or speed of your muscles that lets a waterbender lift and iceberg from the ocean, it's the sheer will of his spirit. You must look inside yourself and find that part of you that feels alive when you bend, and then learn to harness that spark."
The young warrior glanced back over at Hotaru, slightly curious if the girl was taking any of the words to heart... or if she thought he was talking out his ass. Aden couldn't blame her if she did. After all, this was the sort of speech that his own masters had given, and few benders in the Water Tribe ignored their spiritual side more than him. Aden was a warrior who placed more value on solid technique than raw power, but all the same, for a beginner they would need to tap into the source of their bending before they even had something to train with.
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Post by hotaru on Nov 22, 2008 13:35:22 GMT -5
Aden bent some ice seats for them and sit ease she sat herself down crossing her legs up with her and placing her hands in her lap lazily. She was looking down at her bare hands, playing with the furred trim of the loaned parka.
Why was it that she was so weird? The pale skin was enough but she had to be different from everyone else in more ways than that. Hopefully her little cousin would be a water bender, he looked water tribe, it wasn't like Mica's family had any traces of bending, he wouldn't be an earth bender. Maybe he's get lucky and be a non bender. That would be somewhat comforting.
Then again they didn't want her around anymore. She'd never really liked her little cousin but knowing that they wouldn't want her around him hurt. Her uncle had always looked out for her, now he didn't want to even see if she was alright. It hurt, all because she was a stupid fire bender. Still she watched Aden as he went about trying to explain the spirituality behind bending. She nodded a little listening to his words but not taking them to heart. Good benders needed spirit, she didn't even know where to begin.
She'd never get to raise an iceberg from the water or heal someone who was injured or sick. That was out of her range. Had she been a normal person and a water bender she could go and learn from one of the mater healers, sitting in front of a dummy practicing with the other girls her age. Giggling and talking about chores or cute boys. She wanted that normalcy. she'd never wanted to be different.
" I don't like my spark." Hotaru admitted finally curling into herself somewhat, the large walls around her helped in her a little bit with the struggle of emotions she had, knowing that Aden was the only one looking at her helped a lot and she'd never gotten a chance to say all the things she wanted to.
Her bending had always been a secret she kept to herself and her mother, the only one who knew didn't talk to her about it. It made her confused, was it any surprise she'd lost control and wound up in the situation she was currently struggling with.
" Part of me likes fire bending, it feels right, but the rest of me says it's bad. I'm no better than any of the other firebenders. I don't want to be a fire bender, I want to be a water bender and fit in. " Her eyes started to fill up with tears, she was a little girl after all. This situation was too big for her to handle,
" Fire is bad, fire takes things away from everyone, if took everyone away from me and even now it won't leave me alone." Her voice nearly cracked and she pressed her hands to her face starting to sob again. Her shoulders were quivering and her stomach was contorting, all in all she felt sick.
" I just want to be normal." She whimpered and broke down sobbing incoherently with little passes of words mixing themselves into her cries.
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Post by aden on Nov 22, 2008 23:54:06 GMT -5
Things were beginning to take a turn for the worse. Despite his best shot at providing some sort of guidance or inspiration, Hotaru's resolve was crumbling before his eyes. Her self-loathing made him pity her and want to say something comforting, but at the same time he felt there was some measure of truth to what she was saying. How could he, of all people, really rebuke her for her opinion on fire?
Her sobbing elicited a deep sigh from him, though, and he lifted a hand to rub between his eyes. "Listen..." Aden said, finding the need to say something to keep this girl from crying, but unable to come up with anything good.
"You're different than other kids, but that doesn't make you a bad person," he told her. "And whether you use it or not, bending is a part of who you are. You'll never find real balance within yourself if you ignore it."
Aden took a deep breath and dared to drop to a knee beside her seat. He wasn't about to start dishing out hugs... he'd only really met this girl today, and she was a firebender at that! But still, he'd come far enough in his battle against his own inner demons to allow for some form of emotional display.
"Hey," he said from his closer proximity, speaking softly again to try and gain her attention, "I dont think anyone is asking you to become a master bender or to fight anyone. Just to control your... gift." There was a moment's heasitation in that last word, for it truly took some effort on his part to refer to firebending as a 'gift'.
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Post by hotaru on Nov 23, 2008 0:21:46 GMT -5
Her eyes were bleary and she felt her little heart shrink at the thought of being alone, she wanted her mom to hug her and tell her it was okay, she wanted her hair brushed and braided just so she could undo it as soon as she was out of sight. There was so much she wanted but wouldn't have anymore. But at least she was getting it out instead of keeping it inside. It was better than being left to stew until she broke.
Hotaru's chest heaved as she tried to breath, keeping up with her lungs desire for oxygen. Each breath that went in came out as a broken sob from a broken little girl. Her hands wore themselves in her eyes trying to rub out the salty warm tears that over flow and stream down her cheeks.
A large hole in her chest throbbed and she tried her best to calm down but it hurt. She was finally able to look at him as he tried to comfort her, getting down to her level. Her dark brown hair was partially plastered to her face and she rubbed it out of the way and looked at him shyly her sea blue eyes meeting his icy eyes. It felt like something her mother would say, he even had to force out the word gift like she did. Her expression dropped pathetically, she was young but not stupid, of course she was cursed, not gifted, how was this a good thing?
She felt worse then before but at least the sobbing stopped though the tears kept coming, they were much quieter. " Firebenders killed my parents, I'm alone now and it's the fire nations fault... I don't want to have a gift, I want to be normal..." Hotaru turned her head looking away meekly, when you were the monster you feared lived under your bed what could you do to chase it away?
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Post by aden on Nov 24, 2008 0:47:06 GMT -5
It was painful to just sit there and watch the girl cry, but what more could he do? Aden had almost no experience with kids much younger than himself, and aside from trying to sound calm and soothing he really didn't know what to do. He felt like Hissun had tricked him into this situation under the pretense that the student was already willing to learn. Aden could see himself teaching someone how to fight, but talking this girl through a complex emotional crisis? There couldn't be many more people who were less-prepared for that... Once Hotaru began mentioning the loss of her family, however, it struck a far more resonant chord with the young warrior. He couldn't match her loss in quantity, he knew, for his parents were still alive. But all the same he had felt the same pain she had with the loss of his friend, Mani. His hand absently drifted up to his collar and clamped against the right side of the base of his neck. For a moment he considered telling Hotaru what had happened to him, perhaps even pointing out the scar to show that he could sympathize with her whole-heartedly. But as he weighed that option he decided against it. That would be selfish, he realized. This girl was baring her own tragedies to him, and compounding them with his own could only weigh her down further. No, he wouldn't heap that burden on her as well. For now, he would just let her grieve and try to share some of her pain. "The Fire Nation has left it's mark on us all," he said. Aden lifted a hand near her face, and with a gentle motion he used his bending to remove the moisture that soaked her cheeks and was no doubt robbing them of warmth. "But no matter what happens, you are still part of this tribe and there will always be someone to look after you. Just because you can firebend, it does not make you a monster." Aden's eyes widened ever so slightly just a moment after the words left his mouth. That statement came out so easily as he said it, and the logic was perfectly sound, but... He had lived his life these past three years based on the idea that the FIre Nation and all those even associated with that accursed element were monsters hardly deserving of the air they breathed. For a moment, he almost thought to correct himself; to take back that statement that was made out of his attempts to console the girl. But... looking at this little girl who just happened to be a firebender, it seemed like any attempts to contradict his own words would sound hollow and weak.
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Post by hotaru on Nov 24, 2008 1:04:37 GMT -5
She looked at Aden, trying to assess if he was lying or not, it seemed like he honestly cared, cared enough to not run away after the fire and after the water so why should she continue this? Was she testing him or was she trying to see if he'd run away like everyone else? She wasn't too sure but either way he seemed to be telling her the truth. He bent her tears away and she just felt numb sitting with the boy hovering over her protectively, it was some what comforting, she'd rather have a hug but she remembered someone once told her boys were scared of tears and scared of their own emotions so she wouldn't do anything silly.
Her chest and breathing were starting to return to normal, she'd gotten a lot off her chest and even though it still hurt she felt better, it was an understatement, she felt good. She was finally able to talk about her problems with..someone. It was better than nothing, it wasn't her parents back and it wasn't her old home but it was a start. She was able to talk about her problems and with that she was able to own a bit of them. There was still a large issue, that was the hurt. She wanted people from the firenation to suffer like she did. It wasn't fair, but she was a firebender too. That was the most complicated part. But Aden was right, she was raised in the North pole, she learned their lore and lived here, it was her home. Did her bending make her evil?
In some peoples eyes it seemed like it did and she took it in to a certain point. But, she wasn't a firebender where it mattered, she didn't want to hurt anyone save for those who hurt her. It was embarrassing to think it but as she calmed down she grew quiet thinking. Her eyes dropped from Aden's and she allowed her head to drop some what, her thick bangs obscuring her vision for the most part.
She needed to learn to control her fire and needed to accept herself for what she was. Maybe then she'd find her place and stop being left out or viewed as different. She doubted it but she wanted to believe it was true. Hotaru took a breath to calm herself and fiddled with her hands, after everything if someone was still willing to comfort her even a little she shouldn't give up. Even those old men who talked about her like a thing were still trying to help her, in their own ways she didn't understand.
Now much clearer her eyes turned back to Adens silently probing for an answer she needed. " Is it bad of me to want revenge though...?"
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Post by aden on Nov 25, 2008 22:16:19 GMT -5
It was a strange question hear from one so young, especially from a girl. But with all things considered, was he really so much older when he had undertaken his own vendetta against the Fire Nation? His immediate thought was that he was far more mature at 14 years old to committ to vengeance, but really... it wasn't so great a difference in the grand scheme of things.
"No," Aden said after a moment of contemplation, "For someone in your position, I'd say it's the most natural feeling in the world..." He glanced down for a moment before holding Hotaru's gaze. "But sooner or later you will realize that allowing those feelings to consume you will lead to nothing but more pain. On this, you must trust me...."
Aden felt a sudden surge of emotions then, welling up under his calm exterior. He took a steadying breath and forced his thoughts back under control. The last thing he wanted was to have to face his own past deeds right now. Hotaru needed someone to provide support right now, and he couldn't do that if he couldn't even keep a straight face.
"The best we can do cope with the events that happen and continue to move forward," he advised her, "When the path of water is obstructed or disturbed, it adjusts its course and keeps on flowing.... We must learn to do the same."
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